I hate that my health is so just…. SLDFJLAKDJSLFKASJDLF. MESSED UP. Just from eating the cooked vegan the last few days, I am beginning to feel *worse* symptoms again. Strained, tight neck, slight headache, tons more digestive upsets, and a handful of other things. This is so complicated. I just WISH I COULD EAT AND NOT FEEL BAD.

Brad doesn’t want to do the vegan with me, and the cooked vegan has not been good to me. I need to clear out my tummy and digestive tract, since I know it’s all messed up. I’m gonna eat light and focus on smoothies, juice, and fruit for a loooooong while, then go back for 811. I want to eat nothing but fruit. That is a dream come true for me. I LOOOOVE bananas, mangos, dates! I wanted to try the cooked vegan, and I did. I don’t want to feel like hell and it did make me feel that way. I was eating healthy, but my body just doesn’t like much of anything AND I’M TIRED OF FEELING LIKE CRAP. Regular Doctors can’t help me, I can’t afford a holistic Doctor, and the fruit & veggie health pros online say… STICK TO FRUITS AND VEGGIES TO HAVE HIGH HEALTH.

I’m truly listening now. I’m sick of being sick. I really, really, really, am. I know “most” people can just cut the fat, switch to alternative healthy options and lose weight, feel better, blah blah blah, but not me. My body is so messed up that even when I try to eat so-called “healthy” it makes me feel bad. When i was eating nothing but fruit, my digestion was actually a bit better, and I didn’t feel “so” bad.. .still not real good, but atleast not THIS bad. So messed up.

I should of stayed with naners. I am in control of my health, and I want to get better, so I will embrace the light eating and fruit for now to get some of this excess weight off and then load up on fruit.

I’ve got a long, long, long, long road to health recovery. In other news, today was good. We went to church, then I came home to finish up my college paper & I turned it in! I actually posted my introduction for my new course that starts Tuesday. Brad is off work tomorrow!! He took a nap this evening and slept for like 3 hours, so he’ll probably be up late…… as for me, I am going to bed soon. Still gonna keep up with my sleep!

Here’s to health! I will get this right one way or another. I DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!